Throw Everything Out The Window

Article 06 - April 25, 2016

There’s few times where I’m genuinely shocked by my own lack of knowledge on the subject matter. Usually I’m either really confident, or I just pull a reserve and claim ignorance.

So I got back into bowling. I bought a new ball.

The Brunswick Target Zone. A simple spare ball. Ten pounds. But I didn’t buy it for pickups, I bought it for the striking. I know, it’s not its intended purpose, but it looks great and it’s cheap.

Good. Fine and dandy. But then I went on the site, and looked up the specs. What is RG? What is the pin for? Exactly where do I drill finger holes to fit my tiny Pretz sticks into?

Surprise! After all these years of grinding at it I knew none of this.

Yesterday I went over to my local Brunswick house to get the drilling done by a professional. I’m completely lost. I barely knew what a conventional grip was. I nearly can’t answer his question when asked for the color of plastic he wanted to fit over my thumb hole with so my fingers won’t hurt as bad.

I dare not mention the “first ball” thing to him. He’s going to laugh me out of the shop.

My eyes failed to focus on the driller’s craft as my vision blur in front of my new ball while I was thinking. I can’t comprehend what’s happening. I thought I knew.

Of course, my phone came to the rescue. I Googled everything I mentioned above, and more, and right now, as we speak my mind is back up again. Higher RG means it’ll hook later and a better length. Don’t drill an inch within the pin on the ball they used to mold the thing because it destroys it. And I might switch to a fingertip grip on my next ball so my hand comes off easier when I throw.

Maybe my next ball is a Brunswick Slingshot.

Anyway. You see my point? I thought there was nothing in the bowling world that could surprise me. But a single ball purchase flipped it upside down. I’m not saying anyone who wanted to get into bowling, or any other sport for that matter should just buy some equipment and be pleasantly surprised. No, no, no.

But if a ball could expose so many holes in my own self-research, which I proclaim it to be quite absolute in terms of encyclopedic knowledge, maybe I should really just take a small step back. I watched way too much matches compared to actually drilling into the mechanics I missed a lot.

I might nail a few guys on the alley (despite being a 125 average), but those aren’t pros. They are the normal people who maybe bowl once or twice a year. The “weight you can carry” argument is BS. 

With skill I can beat anyone. But nope.

So yeah. I’ll say thanks to my Target Zone. Well done, bud. You’ve never been on the lanes and you’ve already taught me so much.